Thursday, January 10, 2013

A Cheater's Story

lepidopterology


I couldn't help but burst into tears reading this heartfelt letter from a husband to his wife.  I do not believe that people are stuck, that people can't change, that once a cheater always a cheater.  
I believe in metamorphosis.
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I’m A Cheater,
Growing up, this word didn’t really mean much to me.  I cheated on tests at school, cheated in races and even cheated in golf with the odd kick or flubbed score.  Sometimes I would get caught, most of the times not (so I think…).  Then in 2008, everything changed….
I was married to my best friend, my confident, my rock Wendy.  We never had any issues or major fights, we fit like a glove.  But for some reason I pushed those thoughts and feelings aside, and had an affair.
I have always been a person that everyone likes, and I want everyone to like me.  I will help people out whenever possible and even sometimes when it is not.  I met the other women (OW), at the gym and we developed a friendship.  Over time she started telling me her problems, and I would try and fix them or just listen and let her vent.  We talked a lot, and it seemed that I was talking more to her than I was to my wife (I was working 2 jobs, 1 was at the gym).  The OW gave me a gift after a few months; it was a gift cert. for a restaurant in the area.  I told my wife about it, I didn’t want it, but felt that I should take her out of awkwardness since she wouldn’t take it back, I told Wendy and so it went.  We trusted each other whole heartedly, and never would an affair be even a thought in our minds.  That was the first time I moved part of my “do Not Cross” line over a bit.  Over the next weeks and months, we would meet for coffee or have a quick bite while on my breaks.  Then one day came a kiss, I don’t remember who kissed who or how it happened, but looking back I can see that my “Do Not Cross” line was no longer a line but a line with great hills on the other side from all the pushing.  What was I doing?! What was I thinking?!  It had to stop; I won’t tell Wendy and just bury this in the vault.  And that is what happened, for a while…
Read the rest of the letter here on Wendy's blog

5 comments:

  1. Wow...This is an amazing story of change! Thank you for sharing:)

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  2. I still cry when I read this letter. My husband couldnt have written it at a better time. A month later, I forgave him.
    It took just under 5 years, but life is good again. :)

    Wendy

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  3. I love the hope that seeps from your blog -I'm hope starved and it's so refreshing :)

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  4. Whoa.... Going to read all of it. This is interesting from the other end.

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hi

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